How I Learned to Love My Business and Stop Worrying

"...worry is like prayer...if you have none."--Paul Monette

When in business for yourself, you're never really mentally "away" from work.  How often do we find ourselves going over in our minds all the things we should be doing to improve our business:  "I should network more.  I should be better at marketing.  I should have a better Google ranking.  I should go to more Biznik events!"

Don't get me wrong, sometimes a little anxiety can urge us to practice good business.  For example, I fear the IRS; thus, I try to maintain good financial records.  Thanks, anxiety!  But sometimes, anxiety sends us off on a less productive course.  For me, anxiety will sometimes get me thinking:  "I need more clients.  Why did I think I could strike out on my own?  I miss my old paycheck.  I am a failure.  I am going to starve." 

In high school, I had an English teacher who had a keen interest in Eastern philosophy. She introduced me to the Zen Buddhist concept of zazen, seated meditation, or as she described it, "do-nothing". In yoga, after a busy practice, one might end in shavasana, or "corpse pose." Both have at their heart the idea of allowing the body to rest, so that the mind might also quiet. Thoughts might enter one's mind--not to be analyzed as good or bad--but to be observed with curious detatchment.

In my years of therapeutic collaboration, I have learned many ways of doing zazen from others. One client who has had difficulties with "perfectionism" for most of his life did zazen by lying in his bed, closing his eyes, putting on his headphones, and listening to sacred music or chanting. Some others say they practice zazen by silent prayer, or repeating a particular sacred verse or mantra. Other people I know use restorative yoga poses to help quiet their minds.

I have also found that for those (like me) who find it difficult to be physically still, it is possible to achieve zazen of the mind through kinesthetic activity. I know I have known periods of mental zazen while weeding, walking, running, swimming, cleaning, or doing yoga. I know plenty of knitters out there who would testify to the mental benefits of its simple repeated action.

I offer this idea of mental zazen as a counter-balance to anxiety's desire to "busy" the mind with its endless "chatter." Ask yourself, when do I get a break from thinking about my business? When does thinking turn into unproductive worry or "over-thinking"? How can I be more at peace with what I am doing for my business and letting go of what I'm not? How can I resist the urge to re-live past mistakes or to anticipate the future? What would it be like to simply observe my thoughts about my business, such as the way an anthropologist might view a foreign culture? What "thinking space" can I open up that is currently occupied by anxiety, worry, perfectionism, or "should-isms"? If anxiety took up less "thought space", what might take its place?

Making time for zazen is not easy, I know--especially for all you busy Biznik-ers out there! I welcome you to share your ideas for making "thought space" to enjoy being a "solo-preneur" and keeping worry or unwanted anxiety at bay.