Introverts and Extroverts in Business: How To Avoid Energy Drain

As solopreneurs, we all have to find ways to keep fighting the good fight. So knowing your 'vert type and how to keep your battery charged is crucial to staying in business.

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  Posted by Kory Kapitke, Seattle, Washington | Nov 02, 2008

  Very informative and useful. Power to the introvert! (Just kidding).
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  Posted by Leila Anasazi, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Various online features of Biznik are a big win for introverts.

  I meet so many Bizniks who identify as introverts, yet we are able to get ourselves out and network.

  Many of us are using the Bizink website tools to "meet" each other and develop relationships in ways that are energy-friendly for us. Then, come the times when we mingle face-to-face, we have the strength of what we have already (comfortably) developed together to carry us through the "strain" of the networking crowds.

  Sometimes I think the online element of Biznik is under-rated. But, as you say Rachel, the intros' personalities can shine online, and then we can better cope--thrive, even--in those live arenas where the extros naturally sparkle.

  Which, really, is win-win for both types. I mean, I know that some of the extros actually miss us intros when we don't make it to the events :-)

  Writing a book about real sex with real people
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  Posted by Rina Goodman, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Thank you for the helpful tips, Rachel. Such reassurances are very supportive and much appreciated. It's easy to imagine that the extroverts have all the fun and to undervalue the solitary part of the work that we have to do to keep our practices going. On the other hand, we all do need a balance. I love meeting new people, but I do tire quickly at large gatherings. So the early before-burnout exit strategy in big crowds is . . . ?
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  Posted by John Hays, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Rachel,

  As a dyed-in-the-wool intro who sometimes acts like an extro, I think your advice is sound and I intend to put your ideas to work for me.

  I'm going to try your second suggestion to deal with the way I end up feeling at large social events. I'm going to use your first and fourth ideas more than I have already.

  I usually get plenty of solitude; the remodel has cut into my solitude at home. I do need to get out more just for solitude in the outdoors, the source of the greatest and best energy for me.

  Thanks Rachel.

  John

  Seattle Washington Private Investigator
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  Posted by Heather Mundell, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Wise advice! As someone who is an extro, but "just" over the line, I use tips from both your lists. Sometimes I'm ready for recharging solo, and sometimes I gotta find somebody.
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  Posted by Jezra Kaye, Brooklyn, New York | Nov 03, 2008

  Great article!

  Carl Jung was big on this view of intro v. extro, and it's immortalized in the Myers Briggs Type Indicator, but Rachel, you've got them all beat for clear, strategic thoughts about how to cope with whichever you are.

  This may sound crazy, but another great strategy for intros who want to shine at a large conference is to become a speaker or a panelist. Honestly! Lots of excellent public speakers are introverts who've discovered that, while you're onstage sharing your inner (intro) vision, no one expects you to make small talk. :-)
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Wow, thanks for all the comments, guys!

  Kory, it's great to see you online again. Thanks for the compliment.

  Leila, I love what you said about the online personality allowing intros to get comfortably connected with people so that networking in person feels easier. And yes, we definitely miss you and the other intros when you are absent from events!

  Rina, part of why I wrote this article was to debunk the perception that extros have the world on a silver platter. It's true that I can network till the cows come home, but it's also true that I rarely write articles because it takes so much out of me. But I have tons to say, and could happily wax rhapsodic for hours...if I were talking TO somebody in person.

  As for the early-exit strategy, I believe every intro has to find her own. For some, it may be a mere half hour and for others, they could handle two hours or more. What is it for you?

  John, you're definitely an intro who has extro qualities. Everytime I see you at an event, you're diving into the middle of the energy in the room. You meet people with gusto and it's very charming. :) And yes, I hear you about nature being the ultimate restoration. Even this extro needs to recharge her soul at times with some crisp air, an ocean breeze, and some seagulls (Golden Gardens is my preferred nature spot...still kinda public).

  Heather, I wonder if those of us who really work on our personal growth don't all eventually end up in the middle of intro and extro (and other dualities in general).

  Jezra, wow! Thank you for that amazing compliment. And I totally see what you're saying about intros becoming speakers. In fact, I'm pretty sure I've met a few intros in Biznik who are popular speakers...and I couldn't tell they were intros until they were off stage. Further proof that intros can also shine brightly when they find the right method for themselves.

  Anyone else want to share how they cope with their side of the intro/extro coin?

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Judy Dunn, Seattle & Renton, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  This article is something I needed to read today. I struggle with my "secluded-self" and it is probably no coincidence that I live and work on an island.

  The energy issue is so huge. I can write and blog and comment on forums and copywrite all day and I'm awake and alive. But put me in a room with 30 or 40 people and nametags and I get all anxious. And I am exhausted by the time I leave.

  I think some of us introverts are the types who like to focus, I mean really focus, get into a problem or idea and stay there. And we can pass hours that way.

  You have given me something to think about, Rachel. And us introverts, boy do we love to think!

  Excellent article. Thanks.
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  Posted by Jezra Kaye, Brooklyn, New York | Nov 03, 2008

  You know, there's a less-than-neutral aspect of all this, which is that, as the minority type, introverts are often underestimated and underappreciated.

  Part of that is our own "fault," because we don't easily share our thought process or successes with others.

  But part of it is the extroverted assumption that anyone who doesn't talk about themselves all the time doesn't have anything important to say!

  For more on this, check out "Caring for Your Introvert" by Jonathan Rauch (Atlantic, 2003).

  Maybe we introverts should use some of that energy we'll save using Rachel's tips to talk about our accomplishments! :-)
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  Posted by Brody Dorland, Olathe, Kansas | Nov 03, 2008

  Growing up with a mom as a psych teacher, I was always the guiney pig when she wanted to try out a new personality test. I learned of my extrovertedness at a young age and you've hit the mark on your insightful coping mechanisms.

  Myself and several other local, extroverted basement dwellers have resorted to a weekly "entrepreneur's club meeting" on Thursday afternoons at a nearby watering hole. It's great to get out, socialize, vent, network and even discuss business ideas, struggles and potential partnerships. Every one of us looks forward to Thursday afternoons (we work it into our schedules) and our group has grown as friends-of-friends have joined in...
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Brody, thanks for your comments. I bet having a psych teacher mom came with an equal share of challenges and benefits. Your extroverted basement dweller club sounds like a great idea! I have a close colleague with whom I share a lot of my work days, and I have my Nia community to keep me sane.

  Judy and Jezra, it's so interesting that you both comment on how intros can feel "less than" at times, because I've experienced the other side.

  Growing up, I was really into reading and I majored in creative writing in college. Many of my friends were other poets and fiction writers (and artists, too). And I'll tell you, it's taken me some years to get over how much shame I felt at not sitting down to write more often.

  I knew I had talent and good ideas AND I knew that the successful writers were the ones with discipline, so WHY couldn't I just be more dedicated like my friends and put time into my writing?!

  And I'll admit, Judy, that I still sometimes have to stop myself from giving me a hard time when I see how well you do on Biznik with all your articles and thoughtful comments. There's a part of me that gets all "why couldn't I be more like that?!"

  Ooof. Because I'm an extrovert. I just don't work that way. I just don't. And I remind myself that there's no reason to shame myself for it.

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Joe Shirley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Rachel, really nicely written.

  I find myself like Heather, though, needing to pay attention to what kind of recharge I need at any given time. I spent most of my life as an introvert, but seem to be trending more to the center recently, so have to break old habits and make those social connections happen when I need them.

  Seeing it laid out so clearly will help me make that choice more easily. Thanks!

  Biznik Ambassador Mentor & Events Coordinator
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  I would expect that as Biznik Ambassador, Joe, you definitely do have to mingle more than most intros! Thanks for the compliment.

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Joe Shirley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Rachel, is there some kind of hybrid in/extro type? I get major energy from other people, but it tends to be only from people I already know well, who I can be close to and real with. I do pretty well meeting new people, but that takes more energy than it gives me. Large events with people I know are fun and energizing. Large events with nobody I know are hell and depleting.

  Does this make sense? Any clarity you can offer?

  Biznik Ambassador Mentor & Events Coordinator
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Joe, to me that still sounds like mostly introvert territory. Like Jezra refers to above, I think it's more the massive amount of more surfacial conversation that drains introverts, rather than a serious of deeper chats that you might find at a gathering of your closest friends.

  In other words, I think it's more about the level of connection you need from the people you interact with and less about the number, per se.

  It's just that it's rare (for most people) to have that many friends that they get deep with.

  Intros like John and Leila, I'd love for you to chime in and say how that rings for you. As an extro, I'm never going to know as well as someone who lives the intro life.

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Suzette West, Port Orchard, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Hi Rachel, thanks for writing this article.

  When I am around people I truly admire, or when I a spend time with friends and family, I am energized by the interactions and the time I spend with them. However, when I am around people I do not know, an energy drain does not usually occur unless I encounter people who exude negativity. Therefore, I avoid interactions with negative people as much as possible.

  Over the years, I discovered that when I engage in conversations with positive and authentic people, it is an energizing and enjoyable experience whether or not I have known them for years. I have learned to view networking as an opportunity to exercise and strengthen my ability to prevent energy drains from happening.

  Cash Flow & Commercial Site Selection Specialist
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  Posted by Jezra Kaye, Brooklyn, New York | Nov 03, 2008

  Rachel, I'm smiling because you managed to find probably the only area of American life dominated by introverts--a college creative writing program. :-)

  I do, however, want to hold up the honor of introvert writers by noting that, in general, we take a back seat to no one when it comes to writer's block and procrastination!!!

  Your college friends sound like they were the exceptions that prove the rule.
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  Posted by John Hays, Seattle, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  Rachel,

  You nailed it for me when you said "I think it's more about the level of connection you need from the people you interact with and less about the number, per se".

  A large, noisy, networking crowd in a feeding frenzy is not a comfortable place to try to really connect, to have a real conversation.

  Too much noise. Too hard to hear. Too many people trying to meet too many people. Too much movement. Too superficial. Too difficult for two to talk.

  Overload! Overload! I gotta get out of here!

  Whew! I feel better now.

  Seattle Washington Private Investigator
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  Posted by Bob Dunn, Seattle and Renton, Washington | Nov 03, 2008

  First, I have to say I love this last post by John. I so feel your pain! And yes, myself, or both Judy and I, blow out of these functions when we have reached our "intro" limit.

  Rachel, what a great article. Although I shouldn't ride on John's comments again, but I also am an intro at heart, but put my extro hat on many times.

  I think this mainly comes from year's of having a business and all the selling, convincing and networking that has been involved. I spent a many business functions hanging in corners, by the no host bar, or talking endlessly to the familiar faces.

  Also, I have found it convenient to offer either my photography services or bartending skills from way back. Gives me a time to interact to new faces, but more comfortably behind a camera or a bar.

  But, I have learned, and often can find a good balance between the two. So next time you see me, who knows who I will be!

  ~bob

  Marketing, Graphic Design, Blogging Support
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  Posted by Kate Phillips, Carnation/Seattle, Washington | Nov 04, 2008

  What a fantastic article, Rachel! Now I know what a great writer you are, and also why I might not see a "weekly article" from you.

  I've been long fascinated with the intro/extro thing. I test pretty close on something like a Myers Briggs, I think coming up and "I" once and an "E" a time or two. But I don't feel like I'm "in between," I feel radically "BOTH."

  Around people, I'm highly energized, and tend to be one of the last to leave (for instance) a social. I have hundreds of people's numbers programmed into my cell phone. I love interaction and conversation, and enjoy meeting new people (unless they're downers, I'm friendly but not desperate!). And when I moved to Carnation last year (population 2,000, not counting the cows) after 23 years in Seattle, I started encountering some pretty severe isolation after a few months.

  But what all the people who think I'm a classic extrovert don't see are the DAYS on end I "escape" all human contact and retreat to (for example) my parents condo. The HOURS on end I spend reading, writing or playing music, often avoiding telephone interruptions.

  I get tremendous amounts of energy from being with people until... I don't. Then I go and recharge with solitude, until I crave the energy of conversation and community once more.

  There's a great book called "Intimacy and Solitude" that talks about the balance that one brings to the other. Although I read it many years ago, I still think of that main concept often. I enjoy the play between the two, not only the balance, but the extremes, and being radically "both" an introvert and extrovert (even if it makes no sense!)

  I also agree that Biznik gives every 'vert a platform by which they can succeed. (Maybe that's part of their secret to success.)

  Thanks for your insights, Rachel.

  Coaching for Financial Transformation
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  Posted by Lee Kaplanian, Burien, Washington | Nov 04, 2008

  Great article Rachel! And really insightful comments from both intros and extros. As an intro, I find having something to do makes it much easier in a group of people I don't know. Too often the tendency is to think about how we are perceived rather than making someone else feel part of the group. Maybe I am the only one who feels tongue tied, not sure how to open a conversation - finding someone else who looks as lost as I feel can help, after all, you never who you are going to meet.
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  Posted by Judy Dunn, Seattle & Renton, Washington | Nov 04, 2008

  What a great conversation.

  Lee is right. Having something to do certainly helps. A friend and fellow blogger told me I was wise to host our Networking the Island Way event because, unbelievably it takes your focus off yourself and your own social fears. You are too busy making sure everyone else has what they need. It definitely helps.
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  Posted by Leila Anasazi, Seattle, Washington | Nov 04, 2008

  Introvert here.

  If I have to work at just existing in an environment, I get depleted. Noise, crowds, swirling energy without context. EXHAUSTING. Random, chaotic input, sends me screaming.

  I find context in

  • existing relationships
  • common purpose, and
  • stimulus that has beauty.

  So, an event or situation can be full-on swirling energy, but if there are

  • many people I know (and love), or
  • something we are all working towards together, or
  • we are in a place that is sensual (color, light, scent)
  I get energized. I don't have to "work"--to be in such a situation.

  Yesterday I was at the airport, scrambling through security screening, surrounded by screaming babies and panicked strangers, our only common purpose to travel to thousands of disparate destinations for no common reason. Seven minutes of this had me taxed. I found a window to stare out of, at the passing cumulus clouds and brought myself back to myself.

  Which I guess is the equivalent of knowing when to leave an event, or how to sustain myself at an event--or how to pick an event that will bring me energy, not take it.

  Writing a book about real sex with real people
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  Posted by Joe Shirley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 04, 2008

  Nicely put, Leila. The point you make about context makes sense to me, too. Are introverts constantly seeking context? I could almost say it's a reason for being, for me. My life's work - including my "day job" here at Biznik - is all about making sense of the big picture in such a way as to make the moment-to-moment meaningful.

  There's another theme I'm noticing: sensitivity to sensory input. Some people, I believe, are physiologically more sensitive than others, and have a harder time sorting through chaotic input to find the anchors that stabilize their experience. Being in a crowded room for one person vs another can be the difference between white noise and full-on cacophony.

  Sometimes I practice turning the dial down by focusing inward first, until the cacophony subsides and I can navigate through ordinary white noise to seek meaningful connection with someone.

  Another practice is that of listening. When I let go of needing to get a message across or be seen myself, and focus on receiving one person at a time, giving that person my full attention, then even at a busy event I leave feeling great.

  Biznik Ambassador Mentor & Events Coordinator
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  Posted by Teri Johnson, Redmond, Washington | Nov 05, 2008

  Rachel, I appreciated your article and all the discussion it sparked. This is obviously a big issue for many of us. I've always seen myself as a blend of both, and put strategies in place to keep each aspect happy. I am a writer, too, and particularly resonated with your description of having a hard time sitting down and staying with a project. I wondered why that was a challenge for me, and now I can see that my extro wants to go out and play! One thing I've noticed is that when I teach a new class, especially if it is in the evening, I get so stoked I can't sleep for hours. The interaction gives me tons of energy. But if I'm in a networking event where it's really noisy and I have to struggle to hear someone, that is draining, so perhaps it is just as important to know the kind of interaction with others that feeds and the kind that depletes. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, everybody.
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  Posted by Tom McIntire, Seattle, Washington | Nov 06, 2008

  Rachel, Great article and an interesting discussion! I'm an introvert who has forced myself to be more of an extrovert because of my filmmaking activities. I write, direct and unfortunately wind up producing most of our projects. Directing requires a level of interaction that is often exhausting for me even when things are going well. Producing is worse because you have so many people to hire, companies and government bureaucracies to deal with and there's that pesky stay-on-budget issue too. It's not just a matter of worrying about what needs to get done but also, well, all those PEOPLE. :)

  I find pushing myself to interact more face-to-face is a good thing for my sense of well-being. We are social creatures but also creatures of habit - if you continually lock yourself away, it gets harder and harder to connect.

  I am definitely more sensitive to sensory input - when I am in a crowded restaurant, I basically hear everything going on around me and have to force myself to narrow my attention to the person I am with. Good problem for a writer to have - your dialogue sounds more realistic if you have a sense of how other people converse. Not so good for that friend/lover/client who thinks you are not interested in what they have to say. Shopping is grueling for me even when the store is empty - the colors and fabrics and labels and lights and scents and well, you get the idea.

  Something that may seem counter-intuitive that does help me with all of this is going on acting auditions. You have 1 to 3 minutes to connect, show them what you can do and make an impression. You get a real sense of how to connect quickly and say what you have to say. Makes it much easier to do that in a networking or business setting.

  I do take quiet time to unwind with long walks with the dogs or just crashing out in front of the TV. I used to do meditation as well and need to get back to that.

  Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts. t
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  Posted by Barbara Saunders, Portland, Oregon | Nov 06, 2008

  Rachel, very nice job at describing the problem that a lot of us introverts experience. I thought it was funny reading through the comments that most of the comments were introverts. Is that because all of the extroverts are out there mixing it up? I wonder what the shift will be in our society with social media that plays to the introverts.

  I wanted to share an event experience I had last summer. SECP (that's the Self-Employed Creative Professionals - www.secppdx.com) has a half-day workshop where one of the presenters talked about working with your type of personality. She (Vicki Lind - right here on Biznik!) gave us all a Meyers Briggs evaluation and then offered some 'work arounds' that I've found helpful. The best tip she gave was to 'team up' with your opposite for the difficult things. Like draft horses are teamed up - there is one steady one and one exuberant one. The steady one keeps them on track to the goal and the exuberant one drives them forward. This tip has really helped my network (in person) events a lot. I have a buddy that I go to events with. We establish a goal before we go and then we 'work the crowd' together. She's a mingler and will l meet 20 people or more. The ones she thinks I should meet, she brings over and introduces them. I get to stay a little out of the fray, but still have the one-on-ones that work better for me. And I'm keeping my buddy on task by helping her remember that it's a business affair and not a social one. She needs the accountability at the end of the event. We're in similar and collaborating businesses so we don't compete for clients but can team up our services, if needed to provide broader services. It may not be the perfect solution for every event, but it sure has made networking and event going tons more tolerable for me.

  I also think it's so nice to have this type of forum for us to share and how cool of you to write this article to help explain to us that it's OK to be different. We just need to work to our strengths and stop fussing over the weaknesses.

  Thanks Rachel.
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  Posted by Frith Barbat, Seattle, Washington | Nov 06, 2008

  Thanks so much for this article Rachel. I'm a certified introvert, and it wasn't until a couple of years ago that I stumbled upon the energy-based definition you write about. It's helped me enormously to see this characteristic in those terms. If I know I'm going to be drained by a big, social event, I plan my day accordingly, building in down-time before hand, or working at home on something that requires deep concentration, which seems to energize me. I second the comments others have made about how deep connections with trusted friends are energizing for me. In addition, I'm married to an utter extrovert (describes himself as "socially voracious") and it's taken years for me to bring him around to understanding this reality - he is energized by people, I'm drained by them, and that's ok. Thanks for the stimulating conversation!

  Frith
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 07, 2008

  Yikes, I missed a couple days of responding and the comments here took off! Obviously, this topic of how our personalities are in our businesses is a big one.

  Suzette, it sounds like you've become very practiced in noticing who is good for you to be around and who is not. That's a skill that everyone can benefit from--choosing our company wisely.

  Jezra, yes, I did manage to get myself into a community that was ill-suited to my 'vert type, and yes, it's funny how I (as we all do at times) managed to find the one place that would directly challenge my way of being.

  John, thanks for offering your visceral take on what it feels like to be an introvert in a crowd. Sounds like that resonated for other readers!

  Bob, thanks for the compliment. It's always interesting to hear someone's 'vert type when it wasn't obvious. Fascinating that you and Judy both identify as intros. In my anecdotal experience, I've mostly heard of couples who are opposites, like my strongly introverted husband and my super extroverted self.

  Kate, I'm so glad you stopped by to comment! You always write great and popular articles, so your compliment is dear to me. I love hearing about your experience with the strong duality of your 'vert sides. It sounds like you're playing all the notes on the keyboard of life.

  Lee, I'm enjoying the comments on this article, too! More than I enjoyed writing the article itself, actually. :) (That's the social hound in me talking.) Your thought about the tendency to consider perception makes me want to discuss the Enneagram here, which is another typing system, but I digress on that for now.

  Judy, it sounds like another good suggestion for introverts then is to find something to do at an event. Funny, but that helped me out the other day, too. I went to a Biznik event at Twist and felt like being a little fun, so I printed up some of my TOTDs (Thoughts of the Day, which I post on Twitter) on biz cards and put them in a box. I carried that box around with me at the event and invited everyone I met to take one. Definitely made the networking event more fun for me.

  Leila, those are some great bullet points to help people understand more about the introvert experience. I love the suggestion to focus on one thing, even if it's a tree outside the window, to help keep context, which Joe seconded with a similar useful tip. Maybe you could write a companion article to this one, focused solely on the intro experience and giving your tips on what has worked for you?

  Teri, yes, we're all working to be better self-experience-noticers and copers, I think. For the introvert and extrovert parts in all of us.

  Tom, you're the third or fourth person to bring up the sensory input sentivity that intros have. I guess that's one of the biggest signs to me that I'm not an intro. While I don't love a noisy restaurant, nine times out of ten, it stops being noticeable to me within a couple minutes of sitting down. And sometimes I even like the buzz. Interesting that filmmaking challenges your intro self. I have done some amateur documentary filmmaking on a small scale and found that I struggle a lot with all the focused, silent activity: holding the camera and filming, editing and final production all have their rewards and cool stuff, but are somewhat tortuous for me because they're SO solitary.

  Barbara, thanks for letting me know I'm representing the intros alright. It's always a little challenging to speak on the behalf of a style of living that you haven't actually lived, you know? And you're right, most of the comments are from intros. My suspicion is that this is for two reasons: 1) intros have more sustained attention for reading and so are still following what's up in the conversation, and 2) in our extrovert-preferred culture, intros are more interested in a conversation about difference. The difficult thing about those in power is that they don't have to participate in the conversations about prejudice and difference. That's the privilege of being in power. (Oops, some of my grad school learnin' just leaked out of me.) Thanks for sharing your method of teaming up with your opposite. I do something similar and it's so ridiculously helpful!

  I hear you Frith about how useful it is to know this stuff about ourselves and each other. I'm so grateful for all my learning about myself and how I and others work! And I have the flip side of your marriage experience. It's taken a few years for me and my hubby to figure out that we each need to do our own thang, cause I can't couch it every night for him any more than he can be social every night for me. Thank God for compromise.

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Kate Phillips, Carnation/Seattle, Washington | Nov 07, 2008

  Wow, it's like a whole 'nuther article! I'm enjoying the comments.

  Currently dating a real introvert, which can be a bit challenging at times. Then again, I remember being exhausted spending too much time with extra-extroverts. But these days, my primary relationship seems to be with my computer!

  I still have my card from that Twist social.

  Coaching for Financial Transformation
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  Posted by Andrea Cryan, Seattle, Washington | Nov 07, 2008

  Thank you for a very insightful article, and for allowing me to gracefully admit I am an introvert. I find there are times when I enjoy being around a large group of people and times when I don't. When I'm not enjoying the experience I notice that I am like an antenna, picking up so many signals that I go into overwhelm. I need to escape so I can clear my energy and regain myself. It's nice to know that I am not the only one.
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 07, 2008

  Kate, that's sweet to hear you still have your card. I'd love to know which one it was. :)

  Andrea, I'm touched if this conversation helped you to go public with your 'vert type. It definitely sounds like you're in good company in Biznik, since many of the intros who have spoken here are people I know, respect and admire.

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Brandi Pierce, Seattle, Washington | Nov 21, 2008

  Haha! Kate, I still have my card, too! Those were awesome -- and a great marketing tool for you, Rachel.

  Great article and ideas! =)

  Come realize the power of COLOR.
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 21, 2008

  Thanks, Brandi. Which card did you get?

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by John Hays, Seattle, Washington | Nov 21, 2008

  OK, Rachel,

  When are you and Leila, who started an earlier, related conversation, going to organize events geared for us, the Intros of Biznik (the In-Biz).

  The rest of us are too shy ;-)

  Seattle Washington Private Investigator
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 25, 2008

  Ok, John, here's a start: my enneagram event is small (only 8 people tops) and in the cozy, quiet setting of my own office. There will be snacks and facilitated, non-superficial conversation. I think it's intro heaven, but you'd have to let me know. You've been to it before. What do you think?

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by John Hays, Seattle, Washington | Nov 25, 2008

  It absolutely is good idea for intros who haven't been introduced to the enneagram. I learned some very useful things about myself at one of your earlier sessions; and I'm speaking as one who has a strong social science background and have used a number of personality assessment tools.

  And, after that, where's the small potluck in a quiet, cozy venue for us, the In-Biz?

  Seattle Washington Private Investigator
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  Posted by Leila Anasazi, Seattle, Washington | Nov 25, 2008

  hmm. I like that, "In-Biz" :-)

  Sorry, John & Co., it seems like each time I go to launch another In-Biz event, my life takes a spin and distracts me from it :-( Although it IS encouraging to hear so many folks say, "Let's. Let's. Let's." In the meantime, I'm gonna try and make it to Rachel's event, and suggest that any other of us Intros following along at home, consider it, too.

  Writing a book about real sex with real people
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 25, 2008

  Maybe the quiet potluck is yours to host?! That would be fun...

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | Nov 25, 2008

  Thanks, Leila. I do hope to see you there!

  Healing IS possible.
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  Posted by John Voris, Carmel, California | Nov 27, 2008

  Thanks for taking introversion and extroversion out of pop-culture and motivational seminars.

  Private industry searching for cold-call sales reps makes the problem worse. They advertise for new recruites asking for those who are: outgoing; assertive; self-motivatied; highly confident even aggressive etc.

  Theses advertisers however, find extroverts are the first to fail. That's right--fail. Why? Intoverts are able to sympathize with thier prospect. They are able to stand in the shoes of others. Clint Eastwood and many other actors are innwardly focused. That is shy.

  When Johnny Carson died those who knew him best would say that he disliked big parties and would be the one in the corner with a few close friends.

  Introverts are able to express extroversion and do it passionately.

  John Voris - Motivation Analyst
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  Posted by Rachel Whalley, Seattle, Washington | 3 weeks ago

  Thanks for that insight, John. Those are great examples.

  I'd like to add that extroverts can also express introversion, if they've done their personal growth work. I am very able to spend lots of intimate and connected one-on-one time with friends...which is probably why a lot of my friends are introverts.

  And we certainly can also express compassion and connect with sympathy and empathy. Like any "type" of any kind, we all need to work on ourselves to find balance of our innate skills and those which are more challenging.

  It's not just the introverts who can sometimes get stereotyped. :D

  Healing IS possible.