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Ted Rubin
Ted Rubin
Vice President, Marketing & Business Development
New York, New York
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How well do you listen; I mean, Really Listen?

What if your point of difference was an acute ability to listen? What would that look like?

Written May 20, 2008, read 436 times since then.

 

In his highly-rated article about marketing yourself, my friend Joe Hage asks, "What's your point of difference?" I have an idea. What if your point of difference was your acute ability to listen?

Yes, I recognize listening alone may not set you apart from the competition. But among service providers, you may win more business using your ears and eyes than with any other marketing strategy. That's because, with listening, you can understand your prospect, and that understanding wins business. I've lived it.

The Art of Listening 
With all the sales training offered out there, the most often overlooked and simplest to execute is the "art of listening." Listening carefully attracts more clients and closes more sales than talking constantly about anything to do with you or the service you offer.

Unfortunately, the typical sales person always has something more to say and a difficult time closing the mouth. With practice, it's possible ... I know.

The following can improve your listening skills:

  • Listen with your eyes as well as your ears. Use your eyes and ears to show interest in your discussions with prospects. While listening carefully, your eyes can detect body language that can communicate information about what the person is saying and thinking.
  • Don't "overpower" prospects. You will meet prospects that you know you can win over with your intelligence, charisma, and confidence. If you treat these prospects with condescension because you know immediately they are within your grasp you will overpower and lose them. To truly listen to a timid or meek prospect, make the prospect feel vital, happy, and comfortable.
  • Don't argue with prospects. If a prospect makes a statement that you strongly disagree with, do not get into an argument. Diplomatically and respectfully discuss your opinion. Your sincere respect for his or her point of view will build admiration and loyalty. Your purpose is to encourage your prospect to speak freely and opening… making you a friend and confidant.
  • Never knock the competition. Remember that your prospects might be good listeners too. If you speak negatively about others, prospects may be uncomfortable giving you information about themselves. Avoid attacking others to raise your status. This tactic only makes you look petty, lacking in confidence in your own skills, and will most certainly backfire.
  • Listen more than you talk. A sales call should be a dialogue -- with your prospect talking more than you. Listen to every requirement, objection, and make note of as much personal information as possible. The only time you should monopolize the discussion is when you're sure you have what they are looking for… and even that discussion should involve questions and answers from the prospect.

As you can see, listening does not simply mean keeping your mouth shut. The true value in listening is what you learn, in addition to making your prospect feel like they are being "heard."

Listen, interpret, and display understanding. Concentrate on your prospect's tone, inflection, body language, and breathing. With these clues, you'll better understand the prospect, the needs, the wants, and how you can satisfy that need.

Good selling!

Ted

Learn more about the author, Ted Rubin.

Comment on this article

  • Joe Hage
    Posted by Joe Hage, Seattle, Washington | May 20, 2008

    Ted, thanks for this. It complements the real estate marketing article nicely.

    I'd add: your listening skill can be woven into your positioning statement, such as,

    To concerned owners in this real estate market, Ted Rubin is the real estate agent who can assuage your fear because Ted takes the time to listen, really listen, and develop a personal plan that takes all of your assets into account. He takes only 20 clients at a time (references available) to ensure that every client gets personal attention from Ted, a 30-year veteran in the industry who's seen it all.

  • Lauren Davidson
    Posted by Lauren Davidson, Atlanta, Georgia | May 20, 2008

    What a fantastic article! Truth is, our customers don't want to hear about us - they want to know what we can do for them.

    Productivity tip: have these thoughts printed out & laminated. Keep them available to re-read before each meeting whether it be with a partner, prospect or client.

    Incidentally, these listening techniques are also invaluable for building relationships with family and friends :) You always win with listening.

    Kudos!

  • Pamela Ziemann
    Posted by Pamela Ziemann, Bellevue, Washington | May 20, 2008

    Thank you for sharing these insights Ted. Listening has been underrated for so long, glad to see more interest in it.

    Law of reciprocity: when we listen to others, they naturally want to listen to us. Beautiful. Everyone wins.

    -Pamela

  • Kaya Singer
    Posted by Kaya Singer, Portland, Oregon | May 21, 2008

    Hi Ted

    I enjoyed your article. I am somewhat of a "specialist" in communication so I always really resonated with your points. Sooo true and so often missed. Out of fear people talk about themselves and don't listen to their customers and don't understand why they don't build strong relationships. Thanks for the good reminders. Kaya

  • Ted Rubin
    Posted by Ted Rubin, New York, New York | May 22, 2008

    Another tip to add to and coincide with keeping your listening skills top of mind...

    Regularly Ask Yourself Four Questions:

    What am I doing? What should I be doing? What should I be doing next? What should I not be doing?

    This will aid in keeping you focused and help to prevent stagnating within the same routine.

  • John  Powers
    Posted by John Powers, Seattle, Washington | May 23, 2008

    Ted,

    Great article!

    Listening is probably the most overlooked business tool a person can use to be successful.

    John Powers Selling Restaurants

  • Ted Rubin
    Posted by Ted Rubin, New York, New York | May 23, 2008

    Thanks John. Also, as Lauren Davidson points out... listening can be invaluable for building relationships with family and friends as well.

    Have a great long holiday weekend!

  • Stan Hartmann
    Posted by Stan Hartmann, Seattle, Washington | Oct 06, 2008

    Thank you very much to both you and Joe Hage for your valuable insights (and all of you who have posted comments). I've been in produce marketing for all of my career to date and have recently joined the ranks of real estate professionals because now I can finally answer the question, "what do you really love...what would you do for free?". Your articles and vast depth of knowledge shall serve us all well. I look forward to continued sharing with you all.

  • Ted Rubin
    Posted by Ted Rubin, New York, New York | Oct 06, 2008

    Thanks Stan. You're welcome. Good luck in Real Estate.

  • Stan Hartmann
    Posted by Stan Hartmann, Seattle, Washington | Oct 06, 2008

    You too! I'm sure our paths shall continue to cross.